The Dark Side

Give me excess of it, that, surfeiting,
The appetite may sicken and so die.
— William Shakespeare, Twelfth Night, 1601

I’m actually proud of the amount of self restraint I possess and exercise – usually just the right amount for me toe that boundary line without going over (occasional and situational lapses notwithstanding). I’d like to think that pride doubles itself when you factor in my ever so inclined nature towards untested dark waters. Or you could call it curiosity, if it suits you so.. though I don’t think that one word would suffice for an acceptable explanation on my part. The inherent impulsive streak is ever present but these days I try not to follow through: probably finally afraid of the moment where everything just comes undone in a rush. So much more conscious, so much more aware. Now is that a gift or curse?